delineation

It feels so long since I’ve written which isn’t true because I write nearly every day but, in some pocket of my mind, there is writing and there is Writing. And I know better than to delineate such a thing but I do it anyway. Delineate: draw a line, describe or portray precisely, indicate an exact position. This inclination toward delineation is funny because, if you know me well, you know I can be all over the map, my finger (maybe) in too many pies, a magpie, a question mark. My inclination toward delineation is funny because my heart relishes connection and nuance more than it does exactitude. Still, I appreciate clarity, the clarity that (sometimes) arrives with shifting through layers, paring down, drawing lines in the sand… delineating. Sometimes delineation is helpful.

I have a call with a friend. She shares her business experience freely; she shares her heart. We touch on strategy calls and skill sets, fees and clear communication; we touch on marriage and motherhood, natal charts and self… by which I might mean Self (there I go delineating again, self and Self) (for the sake of clarity, of course). We run out of time, with more that could have been said. But isn’t that often the case with someone who sees your heart? The hour was rich, supportive and brought more questions, more points to ponder, more invitations, really, to open my heart.

I prepare for a yoga class, making notes about a yogic concept (a way of being) called saucha. Like much in life, saucha is a practice. It’s a practice of cleanliness, a practice of purifying body, mind, spirit, heart. It’s a clearing out that ultimately makes space for internal clarity. Oh clarity, my old friend, here you are again, elusive yet ever in my awareness. It’s random that I’ve chosen saucha as my theme for Monday night’s class but entirely on purpose that I carry the concept with me more thoughtfully this week. My mind is full of figuring things out while my heart begs for breathing room. I will clear out clear out clear out, make space, open my heart (more), breathe. In hindsight, I see that choosing saucha as a class theme is not random at all, is timely.

And so this leaves me (or finds me) drawing soft lines in the sands of my heart, brushing away old stories and building new ones. It leaves me (or finds me) resting in presence. It leaves me (or finds me) looking to the night sky with its twinkling stars and currently-waxing moon and a spaciousness that I trust is mirrored inside me. As above so below, a blending, a merging, an absence of delineation. Ah, the clarity in that.

The soul has been given its own ears to hear things the mind does not understand.
- Rumi -